Hurrah – I survived! In January the first time for a couple of year I started January with only 10 hours of confirmed work, which is not a position I like being in.  Usually I come back to a large project but not this time.  I know January takes time to start, most people hate the first 2 weeks but gradually people wake up and work starts trickling in. not only have I managed to pick up work (and plenty of it) but I managed to complete my own self-imposed deadline of the 30th to complete the projects for my clients.

Emotionally it was a tough month, especially for my daughter and the realisation that contact with her Father was not helping her & upsetting her.  I took the decision she was unable to make alone and told him not to contact her until he is prepared to listen to her.  He has let her down continually over the years, promising to visit and telling her, but then not turning up.  On many occasions I have mopped her tears from yet another day of longing & disappointment!  The relief in our home is palpable and the atmosphere feels lighter & happier.  Not only have I tried to deal with my daughter’s emotions but also tried to hide my anger towards him as no child deserves to be treated badly.

Although at the moment this feels a relief I wonder how long it will be before my daughter wants contact again, something that if she does want I will facilitate, although I fear the outcome may not be a successful one!

Still onwards & upwards February bought a full diary and so has March.  Far from just planning in my head I have taken to scheduling my hours on my calendar!